Wednesday, October 14, 2009

On The Topic Of The Alarm Clock

 When an alarm is set, it is supposed to sound. That sound is intended to alert one to a specific time, date, warning, etc. Correct?
 This morning, my "Wake The Fuck Up!" alarm failed. For some unknown reason, it simply did not sound. Perhaps it was saying fuck you, I am unsure that the alarm could in fact think- Personally, I would detest being used to rouse a bitchy human at 0620 daily, only to be clutched by clumsy fingers that are still sleep numb, dropped, slammed about, or cursed at. Who is to say that the alarm had not finally reached its abuse limit?

 At 0643 today, Nikki roused me. Her internal alarm was accurate enough. She was dressed, hair brushed, shoes on, backpack in hand... I was in bed, curled against my lovely, in happy dream land, drooling on my pillow.
 "Mom!" in a hushed tone, through the veil of sleep drifted to me. "MOM!" more urgent this time. "Mother! it is 6:43!!!!".  Oh Shit! the realization struck me, that my faithful teli had not vibrated on the nightstand... my mind raced, time was wasting. I did the math. 7 minutes to get dressed, out the door, and to the bus stop. It takes almost 4 minutes to get to the bus stop- Mr. Nathan is always on time.
 I jumped up, groped for some pants. Found them! Triumph. Now, I need a shirt. Oh crap, wheres my bra? Fuck it! No time! I pulled on a sweatshirt and stumbled towards the kitchen... I had shoes somewhere.
 By the time we got to the front door, three minutes had elapsed. I was sweating. Cutting it a little close this time- But we would have missed it entirely, had it not been for Nikki's sense of duty, and her honesty. I do not know many children who would not have gone straight back to bed after realizing that their parents were still asleep.
 So, in reward of her good behavior, I did the thing I bitch almost constantly about- especially when I see children at the bus stop munching on honey buns & pop tarts. I gave her a cookie. For her good behavior, of course.
 We made it to the stop just in time.

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